FIC: Foolish Pride

[saitaina]

For Haidee, my favorite fangirl who will get a dedication when/if "Vlad" is ever published.

Summary: Fights, separation and very stubborn men

Author's Notes: Anytime their not fighting is the present, fighting is the
night before.

***

Harry was curled up in the window seat, his cheek pressed against the glass
as he watched the street below, tears sliding down his cheeks in a slow
procession, falling onto his damp shirt collar. He sniffed and glanced at
the phone before turning back to the street, rubbing a hand across his
cheek.

*

"Why can't you wash a fucking dish in this house?" Harry yelled, slamming a
plate on the counter, shattering it.

"Because you're the one who does the fucking cooking." Draco yelled back,
pushing in a chair, banging it against the table.

Harry slammed another dish down and turned to look at his lover, anger
tinting his cheeks pink. "And you eat it. Your arms aren't broken, Dray.
You can wash a bloody dish."

"That's. Your. Job. Not mine. Someone here has to make money."

Harry stilled, stairing at Draco, too angry to speak, a fine trembling
starting in his body. "I'm not a fucking housewife," he whispered.

"You act like it! Moping around, watching cheesy soap operas till I get
home where you annoy the hell out of me just because you're bored!"

"I wouldn't be bored if it didn't' feel like I was the only one living
here!"

"I'm so TIRED of this argument!"

A chair flew across the room, smashing itself into the wall. "Then maybe
you should stop starting it!"

Draco ignored the vase of roses that went whizzing past his face. "I didn'
t start this, you did!"

"Bullshit!"

*

Draco ran his hand through his hair, pulling a shard of pottery from the
blond strands before falling back on the bed. He refused to let the tears
blurring his vision to fall. His emotions raged, and they sent the objects
in the room floating around him, banging into walls and window as he
battled with himself.

"Fucking hell," he whispered, covering his face with his hands. He sat up,
catching a candle stick from the air before it smashed into his skull,
setting it on the night table. His hand hovered for a moment, eyes resting
on the phone next to the clock. He bit his lip before turning away,
throwing a pillow hard across the room, knocking a figurine from the
dresser.

*

Draco practically ran upstairs, the doors to his wardrobe slamming open as
he entered the bedroom. He could hear steps following his and he growled,
brandishing his wand at his clothes, sending them soaring towards his
trunk.

"Oh yes, just run off as usual. God, Malfoy, you can't even stick around
and fight."

"WHY would I want to stick around, Potter? I'm getting rather sick of
hearing the tone of your voice and since you never shut it.."

Harry threw a stuffed animal at Draco, his anger getting the better of him.
Draco hissed as the sharp point of a piece of plastic on the animal cut his
cheek and he whirled around, stairing at Harry before fling the animal back
at him, shoving his broom into the trunk. "I've had it. I really have.
All you ever do is whine, bitch and accuse me of shit. There is so much
wrong with your head I don't even know where to begin." He grabbed his
cloak and waved his wand again, levitating his trunk. "You're seriously
fucked up, Harry." he said before leaving the room.

*

Harry pulled the quilt closer to him, absently running his fingers over the
embroidered dragon, sniffling as he watched the rain slide slowly down the
window.

The phone lay in front of him, and every so often he'd reach out, dialing a
few digits before slamming it back down, emotions warring inside him,
tearing him apart.

Hedwig had come over, a blank piece of parchment clutched in her beak, but
he pushed her away, tearing the parchment to little pieces. Hedwig had bit
him hard on his hand before flying out the open bedroom window.

Harry sniffed again and closed his eyes, leaning back against the wall,
exhausted, worn thin, and quite miserable.

*

"I'm fucked up?! I'm not the one who wonders around in a drug and alcohol
induced fantasy land! You can't drown your demons, Malfoy!"

"At least I get some piece and quiet when I'm passed out." Draco muttered,
searching for a bit of Floo Powder. Harry grabbed his arm and Draco jerked
away, glaring at him. "Do. Not. Touch. Me."

"Don't want to more then I have to, but you're not just Flooing away from
me!"

"Watch me, but wait, you can't see anything can you? Even when it's right
in front of those stupid glasses!"

Harry grabbed the jar of Floo and threw it out the window, scattering the
granules on the wind. Draco gaped after the jar before heading for the
door, his trunk bobbing along after. He paused in the entry hall and
grabbed Harry's car keys, opening the front door.

"YOU CAN'T WALK AWAY FROM THIS!"

"Too late, Potter." Draco said, the door slamming behind him.

Harry sunk to the ground, stairing at the door his lover had just walked
through.

*

Draco curled on the bed, clutching a silvery, velvet cloak to him, his
tears soaking into the fabric. He sniffed and stared at the phone in front
of him before suddenly flipping over, stairing at the blank wall, trying to
ignore thoughts of angry emerald eyes or flying vases.

Hermione watched her guest from the doorway, a tear sliding down her cheek
as she flicked her wand, torn bits of moving picture floating to the
rubbish bin she held. She wiped the tear as she looked down at dozen bits
of the smiling face of her best friend. She pulled a twisted, broken ring
from the paper and ran a finger over the melted metal, sighing as she made
out the engraved promises.

Turn out the lights the competition's over
The stubborn souls are the losers here tonight
And while the bridges burn, another hard-hard lesson's learned
As through the ashes passion slowly dies
Chalk another love lost up to foolish pride

Comments

[haidee.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much for this Saitaina.
*cries* that was just so.....real. So very Harry and Draco.
Loved the 'Dray' :)
You write so 'real'. I know that sounds silly and not quite what I mean, but when I read things like this I 'feel' them as if this is happening to my best friends, and I NEED to try and help.
Loved the ring too, where is the promise from?
I feel happy that there is this, but sad because they are so unhappy apart, but can't seem to make it work. So much like real life. Don't you just want to smack them both and send them to their room? I know I do. You know, if someone interfered though, I get the feeling they'd band together and gang up on the interfeeree ;)

[saitaina]

They would completly band up and gang on the interfearee. And the last bit was from the song Foolish Pride by Travis Tritt(a GREAT artist).

After having these two live in my head (they have a tiny flat they share with Neville and Percy somewhere in my brain) I do feel rather sad that they can never seem to make things work, especially in my fics. I resist the urge to chain them to their bed and lock them in till they work it out though, I would never get fics out of them that way.

[haidee.livejournal.com]

Hey, I know! Maybe you should suggest they get maid service! That would shut Harry up for at least a little while, and they could get some snuggle time. Gotta admit, Harry sounds so much like me what I have a flatmate. I'm so glad I'm on my own. I can't think of anyone I hate enough to make them live with me and the pet rats. At least they don't eat all my food and not do any cleaning up ;)

You know, reading through that previous post, I sound like a deranged maniac. I can assure you I'm not, or at least I'm on the other side of the world, so you don't have to worry :)

[saitaina]

you're so not a deranged maniac. You're my favorite reviewer next to my best friend who takes FOREVER to review the novel length fic I write.

I can totally go with what you say about living alone, although that's because I'm a complete scatter brain who can't clean my house unless forced. I once set a plate in my drawer and forgot about it for several monthes (luckily I only used it to shore up a TV dinner tray so there was nothing icky on it).

[haidee.livejournal.com]

well, I moved out of home when I was 16 and spent YEARS in shared accommodation *shudder* When I moved in with friends it was just too scary to open the fridge for ages. Neil kept a chickens foot in there for ages to torment the visitors with. I even got a huge poster/certificate letting the world know how brave and intrepid I am because I cleaned it out one day. That was fun. I still have those friends :) Friends truly know me, when they go for the fridge and I say "Don't open it" they back away slowly and leave it alone *grins* I think the only time my place gets cleaned up is when I can't see the floor to wheel my bicycle in. Or my parents are visiting. If I don't clean up, I can't stop mum from doing it for me, and she puts everything in the wrong place. Mothers! Can't live with 'em, can't shoot 'em and hide the body.

Since my operation I do't eat a lot any more, so not many dishes. I just heat and eat. I miss cooking sometimes though. I cook when I visit the 'rents but they like meat and 3 veg and that's just boring, but they won't eat anything else. I think I need a boyfriend that likes to eatr, just so I can justify cooking again ;)

oh, and thanks for the kind words, I don't review many fics, just your and Muffys. SHe writes scary stuff! Vernon/Elvis was the last one. *shudder* is scary and evil! Her Crookshanks/garden gnomes was inspiring though :)

[saitaina]

I used to pay my mother to clean, then she got tired of that and paid ME to clean...was a nice arrangement considering I'm greedy.

I so understand about cooking. the one career everyone says I would rock at is cooking. I don't get it because I'm just doing something I love and following a recipee but apparently everyone sees something I don't. For me it's just fun.

And now I feel more honored you read and review my work. :o)

[haidee.livejournal.com]

no problem, you were the one who sent me scurrying off to the Anita Blake yahoo groups, where I promptly annoyued the list owner and nearly got baned on the first day. I do love that group, so much good fic coming out of it. Wish Laurell K Hamilton would write faster though.

I read lots and lots of fanfiction. The really good ones, or the ones I think I can add to contructively I review, most I don't though, it seems to get so samey sometimes. and I hate 'me too' posts.

Wish my mum would pay me to clean, not gonna happen though. When I visit I stay for a week and scrub the floor as my 'rent'. The floor v=covers the lounge adn kitch/dining area. Damn her for getting white tiles. They have 4 small dogs, and two large men living there so the floor always needs doing. Before that it was the stove (mainly because I won't cook on a filthy stove)

My best friend is a vegan and a chef. SHe's recently gone into the welfare sector and stopped 'cheffing' she says she doesn't miss cooking, but she misses having all that food rightg on tap :)

[saitaina]

The Anita group wouldn't be Blood Quarter would it? Can't imagine what would annoy trace considering I haven't been banned yet and I've annoyed her (on purpose) for four years.

Mum and I have always had this sort of relationship. I guess it comes from dad's genes or something because he used to not babysit me unless he was paid...

I understand about the pets/white tiles. We have four cats, two dogs and two humans here (I moved back home) and wood/linolium floors. We gave up moping ages ago and now swipe at it if it's brown instead of white.

[haidee.livejournal.com]

well, my first week on the board she posted a fic that was very, very similar to the Merry stories, same outline, same amount of men, fairy princess having to get pregnant and when she asked for feedback about her original idea I asked her which one? And said it was similar to the Merry books. Being an Anita/Laurell/Vampire series I figured she had to have read them, and the first Merry book had been released about a month before. She promptly blasted me, and said she hadn't read the book, and her story was based on an old cletic myth and that I should just shut up and go away. So I didn't post much after that, just read the fic that was posted.

I was a bit of a newbie back then and took things way more seriously than I do now.

[saitaina]

I remember that! I had to calm her down afterwards. Yeah, Trace never did get the books on schedule so she was really pissed off about that. But considering the whole Merry series is based off the same myth, not that hard to understand the simularities.

Feel free to speak up onlist if you want, Trace has probably forgotten by now and if not who cares.Any problem she has I can talk to her about since I do it anyway when we dissagree (usually over my Gary Sues whom I like and she hates).

[haidee.livejournal.com]

oops, missed this last post, I was chatting it up on the cross stitch website I frequent.

I still read Blood Quarter, if I read something I really, really like I'll probably fangirl away, but nothing's caught my fancy. I have to admit too, I'm not reading BQ as much as I should because I have to much backlog. I got sick and I've been filing them away so I don't miss stuff. Oh well, Spit Happens.

As to Trace, she probably has forgotten. I'm not terribly fussed about it now though. I did get a few nasty emails from other people about it though, but that was back then. I really really should read more. New Anita should be out next year. I've been keeping score on how many people I've converted. I'm up in the high 30's :) I bought 3 copies of Guilty Pleasures and just pimp them out to people. If they like that one, I send them to the library.

[saitaina]

:)

huh

[sanitiesend.livejournal.com]

some things never change, though i don't guess i should expect them too. still quality work, and the whole relationship turmoil thing. always a fun read, did indeed enjoy. one of these days i will break down and actually read HP... one of these days. you're driving me to adjust my reading list, which takes alot to do. usually only deep, intellectual conversations in english class drive me to do the actual prerequisite. damned quality fanfic's cramping my style. ;)

keep up the good work.