Ugh

[saitaina]

Originally published at Memoirs of a Nobody. You can comment here or there.

Mum and I are going to attempt to quit smoking (again!) when we run out of fags towards the end of the month. I keep staring at the pills and nicotine spray wondering what disaster is going to stress me out enough that I reach for a smoke. First time it was the drama with Pirates of Penzance (never become a stage manager for a play when you’re trying to quit smoking, it leads to you screaming at the cast “I don’t give a fuck who your partner is, just grab a pirate!” before storming out of the rehersal), after that, I think it was drama with my apartment managers…haven’t tried again.

Mum’s also looking up surgeons for my stomach surgery…apparently every other surgeon in the state who does this surgery has gone out of the buisness due to malpractice insurance rising. Stupid insurance bastards.

I need to stop my brain. I’m on my second week of a self improsed break and I keep getting ideas for various activities from writing to graphics to creating a DC/MK desktop theme.

And I miss my Valley. It sucks when my best friend doesn’t have internet because I can’t poke her, also miss my boyfriend since he’s NOT SPEAKING TO ME! (I’m assuming his busy or sick as we aren’t fighting…that I know of *scratches head*).

*stares at Open Office* I will not write today, I will not write today…must not write today…

Wonder if I can bug mummy and distract myself…

Oh yeah! Mummy got a livejournal! I’m so proud of her, moving into the world of interconnectedness (oo, I made a new word). I still have to teach her some basics but it’s fun to watch her learn. I’m trying to get her to join some communities, stuff for depression and that so that she might get some people to talk to about her problems. Or just find people who have gone through/are going through what she’s going through.

She got a new therapist too, hopefully this one will be better then the last two. They (dept. of mental health) told her the other day that they can no longer see her because she had medicare and medicare doesn’t pay them enough (umm, you guys see patients who can’t pay you at all, I would think you’d be happy to be getting ANY money…), so she’s now seeing a private practice therapist who only charges 20$ an hr (she’s cutting mum a discount because mental health is a prat), I have high hopes for this therapist…wonder what she’ll do to piss me off (they all do, either by saying I shouldn’t live at home, that I’m ‘abusing’ my mother, ect and so forth).

Wish it wasn’t raining so I could go outside… *stares longingly at the roses to be planted*