saitaina | Hidden Messages

Originally published at Memoirs of a Nobody. You can comment here or there.

I privated my message on Yassar Arafat’s death due to my respect for those who do not mourn him and would not be happy with my words. But one part I wanted to un-privatize so I put it here.

Before I say what I want to, I would like to state, that I do not agree with everything he has said, in fact I disagree a lot, just like I disagree with the other side. I don’t know enough about what is going on between the two peoples to make a judgment. But I do morn the man. Just like I do all for those who at least sit down to form a way of peace…even if they do walk away in the end.

Below is what I wrote that I’m allowing the public to see:

I remember why I wanted to be President now. So that I could stare at world leaders and try to stop the wars I’ve spent my life watching on the news. So I didn’t have to watch another eleven year old who wants peace…grow into a sixteen year old wanting to kill themselves in battle.

I admit it, I’m an American. I grew up in a Poverty to Middle Class home. I have never seen people die in front of my eyes (well, except for my two grandfathers but they had a slow death). I have buried friend, but not because of war.

I can’t understand because I haven’t been there. But that doesn’t mean I don’t want to stop. I grew up with pictures of body parts, blood, death and war. I’m used to it. I dont’ want my children to have to see another child grow into a killer, another nurse cry over a soldir’s blood soaked shoes…another death…another image that tears apart my heart. I’m used to it…I don’t want them to be.